Vintage Photos That Are Meant For Mature Audiences Only

Few things are as satisfying as a trip down memory lane — and it’s even better when you find something you didn’t notice before. Because as Ferris Bueller said — life moves pretty fast. Here are dozens of pictures of celebrities and remarkable people of yesteryear in all their beautiful, vintage glory. The glamour, the fashions, the hair — whether classically elegant, effortlessly cool or interestingly tacky, we shall not see their like again.

Here’s to the movie stars who were larger than life, here’s to the rock stars who lived on the edge, here’s to the comedians who still make us smile, and here’s to the bit players who had those moments of glory that changed their lives forever. It’s all good, it’s all groovy and the rest is history.

Burt Reynolds and Farrah Fawcett during the filming of the 1981 comedy “Cannonball Run”


The 1981 road-racing comedy The Cannonball Run was packed with star power: Dean Martin, Sammy Davis Jr., Adrienne Barbeau, Mel Tillis, Terry Bradshaw, Dom DeLuise, Jackie Chan and 007 himself, Roger Moore. But you could have left all of them on the side of the road and powered to box office success with this supernaturally attractive pair of human beings: Burt Reynolds and Farrah Fawcett. He was the greatest heartthrob of the late ’70s; she had the decade’s hottest poster and was the hottest lady detective on Charlie’s Angels, a show that was completely about conspicuously hot lady detectives. The chemistry in the movie (and this photo) wasn’t fake — Fawcett and Reynolds were romantically involved for a time.

Marcia, Marcia, Marcia! You’re gonna lose! Lose! Lose! A miffed Maureen McCormick on The Brady Bunch, 1972


Here’s Maureen McCormick as Marcia Brady at the height of her miniskirt-enabled powers. Though she may have been every teenage boy’s crush in 1972, on this particular episode of The Brady Bunch, “Greg’s Triangle,” she doesn’t come out on top. See, her adopted brother Greg is to cast the deciding vote in the selection of head cheerleader (wait, why does Greg get to vote on– oh, never mind), and he’s torn between his sis and his girlfriend-du-episode, Jennifer. In the end, Greg does the somewhat-right thing and chooses neither of them, instead of giving the top job to Pat, who is played by Rita Wilson in her first TV role. Jennifer, predictably, dumps Greg after the vote, but in a surprise twist, the normally self-centered Marcia praises her brother for his decision.

Christopher Walken performs for his young neighbors at his home in Bayside, Queens. (1955)


Just when you thought you’d seen Christopher Walken at his creepiest, here he is as a clown to fuel your coulrophobia (it means fear of clowns). He’s only 12 years old in this shot, decades away from his chilling performances in The Deer HunterA View to a KillKing of New York, and Pulp Fiction, but he’s clearly already been bitten by the showbiz bug. Walken — known by his given name “Ronnie,” during his early career — would get his start acting on stage and TV and doing quite a bit of song-and-dance in New York’s nightclubs and cabarets. This would explain the bizarre dancing Walken you may have witnessed on Saturday Night Live, or in the video for “Weapon of Choice” by Fatboy Slim.

Sean Connery doing a handstand for Ursula Andress on the set of “Dr No”


Suck it, Trebek! Sean Connery, the manliest Scotsman of ’60s cinema, just had to show off for piping-hot Swiss miss Ursula Andress on set, didn’t he? Dr. No (1962) was the first James Bond movie and Honey Ryder (Andress), who unforgettably emerged from the ocean in the white bikini pictured here, is considered the first cinematic Bond Girl. Andress’s character as written by Ian Fleming in the novel was slightly different — in the book, her name is Honeychile Rider, and she wasn’t wearing a bikini (or even a one-piece) when she met an agent 007. In another tweak to make the movie watchable, all of Andress’s dialogue was dubbed by voiceover specialist Nikki van der Zyl. Ursula may have been easy on the eyes, but her harsh Swiss accent was murder on the ears.

“Jungle Pam” Hardy, one of drag racing’s main attractions in the ’70s


Jim Liberman was a drag racer who went by the nickname of “Jungle Jim.” He won a lot of races in the 1970s. Fans loved him for his flamboyant personality and masterful driving. But this is not a picture of Jungle Jim — this is “Jungle Pam” Hardy, Jim’s sidekick, who commanded attention at the track with her tight, skimpy outfits. She had a job to do, as Jim’s “backup girl,” she helped guide him as he drove his Chevy Vega backward on the track after a burnout. Pam joined Jim’s team in 1973 and in 1977 Jim died in an off-track car accident. Though she only did the job for four years, Jungle Pam remains the most iconic backup girl in drag racing history.

Oh Yeah! “Macho Man” Randy Savage, Miss Elizabeth and Jesse Ventura in 1983


Be honest — which of these three sparklers from 1983 would you have pegged to be the future governor of Minnesota? History tells us it was Jesse “the Body” Ventura (at right), and not Randy “Macho Man” Savage or the lovely Elizabeth “Miss Elizabeth” Hulette. Randy and Elizabeth would marry the following year, and she would later debut in the WWF as Macho Man’s mysterious, glamorous manager. Sadly, neither Macho Man nor Elizabeth is with us today. Ventura, who served one term as governor and has since remained a popular political figure, occasionally floats the idea of a bid for the U.S. presidency.

Cindy Morgan as ‘Lacey Underall’ in a scene from the comedy film “Caddyshack,” 1980


A young lady starts on radio, becomes a weather woman on local TV, sells green soap and ends up in perhaps the most quotable comedy ever made — no, it’s not a Cinderella story, it’s the Cindy Morgan story. She did indeed work as a radio DJ and newscaster while in college, and a meteorologist after graduation, but America got its first good glimpse of Cindy in national TV commercials, snuggling up to clean, beefy Irishmen as the Irish Spring Girl. She made her mark in movies as Lacey Underall, Judge Smails’ bad-girl niece, in Caddyshack (1980) and went on to play Lora/Yori in Tron (1982).

A beautiful 2,000-year-old genie named ‘Jeannie’


Barbara Eden played a genie named Jeannie on the sitcom I Dream of Jeannie and you have to wonder — how did they get away with this? Her midriff-baring outfit made her a sex symbol from the show’s first episode in 1965 but the outfit was strictly regulated. While Eden’s ribcage and cleavage were allowed to breathe free, NBC decided her navel should always be covered. The network brass mandated billowy harem pants in a further attempt to tone down Eden’s sex appeal, lest a woman appears with midsection and legs exposed. Eden even had to wear a one-piece suit in a scene filmed at the beach. Armchair theologists (perhaps after a few beers) have debated whether Adam and Eve had belly buttons. Did a TV genie named Jeannie have one? We will never know.

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